Honoring my mom

Today is the 100-year anniversary of my mother's birth. What follows is the eulogy I wrote for her.

We are here today to celebrate the life--the 91-1/2 years of life--of Winona Barganier Ward Matthews.

Although Winona left this earth on the morning of July 1, 2003, look around you. You can see her in the children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren and other loved ones who are here today.

She would be happy and proud of everyone who is here. Winona cherished her family, and her family cherished her. She loved her home, and she loved to be with her family--those were the two most important parts of Winona's life.

Winona was born on December 7, 1911 in Reagan, Texas...A brother and sister followed.

In the old photographs, we see in Winona the dark eyes that were one of her defining features, along with her bobbed short hair framing her expressive eyes.  She was a child who grew up in the country, barefoot and playing outside in the hot Texas sun.

But when Winona was nine years old, tragedy struck. Her mother died suddenly of a heart attack. Winona's brother was four and her baby sister was just nine months old.

Winona then stepped into a role she would give the rest of her life to--caregiver and caretaker for those who depended on her. In fact, a relative once admonished her father into getting more help to take care of the baby because Winona was always toting her on her hip and the relative was worried that the young girl's spine could become curved from the baby's weight.

Eventually, Winona's father remarried and another sister was born.

So Winona grew up. She played basketball in bloomer pants and graduated from high school. On she went to the University of Texas and received a two-year teaching certificate. She then went back to the country and began teaching scrawny farm boys and shy schoolgirls. She even taught in a one-room school where some of the boys were larger than her, and in those times, possibly approaching her own age.

Then, circumstances and a blind date with one fellow changed her life. His name was Jake Ward, and he was everything Winona was not: big, brash, outspoken, and irreverent. Somehow, the unlikely combination grew into a relationship and then marriage in June 1936. The two were married in Jake's sister's living room in Dallas. The next day, they took in the Texas Centennial at nearby Fair Park.  And so the two settled into married life.

A son, David, arrived in 1941; a daughter, Donna, followed in 1946; and another daughter, Jan, in 1952.

Raising three children and looking after Jake were the focus of Winona's life, and there were many happy years. Then, in 1974, Jake died, and Winona found herself alone at the age of 63. But she had her family around her and like the phrase in the picture that always hung in her home said, she "kept on keeping on."

The next years were full for Winona; there were many changes--most good and some not so good. But through it all, she had her family and for that she was grateful.

Winona had some trying times the last few years. In March 2002, she had to go to the hospital (the first time since the last baby was born) and get a pacemaker. But she got through it and recovered and returned to her apartment. She was extremely proud that she could still "do" for herself and managed well for the next year.

However, on March 1 of this year (2002), practically to the day of the previous year's hospitalization, she suffered a stroke and heart attack.

The last four months of her life were difficult for Winona and her family.  She didn't like what was happening to her, and her family was torn by her struggle.

And so, on July 1, 2003, around the time of a glorious, colorful sunrise, Winona's spirit was freed from this world and is now at peace.

She would not want us to stay in our sadness and in our grief. She was a woman who "kept on keeping on" and she would want us to do the same. We take comfort in the fact that she is at peace now, among all those she loved who have gone before her.

We must take comfort in our memories of her--she loved her family, she loved pretty flowers, and by the way, she loved to eat. Who among us could forget her saying, "I only want a bite," and those bites would just keep coming. And how could we forget her fried chicken with gravy, her peach cobbler, and her lemon icebox pie. All of this, and much, much more was made and given in love by Winona.

We who are her family and friends are richer and more blessed for her presence in our lives. We will miss you, Winona, but we will celebrate your memories and your life and your love.

God be with you on your journey and with us as we continue ours.

Bless you, bless you, sweet Winona, and thank you for all your gifts.

We love you always,
Your family